analytic

Wednesday 2 March 2011

What creep... how can he call himself a man

This post has nothing about adoption but I need to get this off my chest.

Many years ago I met a young lady who at the time had two beautiful daughter and we became very good friend.  One of her daughters is ill and according to the doctors she should not be alive today... but that kid is now a beautiful young lady and remains always a true inspiration.

To cut a long story short, I moved away from the area where we lived and the mother had got herself a new boyfriend... and I didn't like him and thought he was a nasty piece of work, so I was an idiot and sort of let our friendship fizzle out.  Then over a decade later we get back in touch on one of the social networking sites and our friendship was rekindle.

It turns out that I was right about that boyfriend... OK, he gave my friend two more beautiful kids and these kids are a credit to her and her alone (all her kids are) and fair enough, I do not know his "side" of the story about their breakup etc.

For me that does not matter, I think any outsider would agree with me... how can a man... a father.. insist that the house his children lives must be sold and force their mother and them to move out.  Bear in mind that the mother is a full time carer for the ill daughter and his two children is under 12 years old.  

The proceed to hold up the equity in the property, so my friend cannot use the her share of the equity to purchase a decent property for herself and the kids.   Part of the money to buy the property in question came from her selling her previous house.

 Now he is taking his children's mother to court claiming she owes him money??  Whilst all of this goes on... he does not even pay child support for his kids and has not done of ages.


He is still trying to bully her and saying stuff like she is not entitle to certain benefits if she does this or this, as a full time care and mother of two young kids she cannot work and have to rely on the state to live, 

They have a court case coming up and he and his family (who is actually fairly well off) is going after her with their "big guns", she will be there by her lonesome.  They even said something along the lines that it is unfair that they have to pay for lawyers whilst her lawyers are being paid for by the public purse.   HELLO...if he was not taking her to court and he was paying for this kids they wouldn't have any court cost would they????     


From what my friend tells me he spent a decade trying to break her spirit and nearly succeeded... so she went from a strong fighter who would take on doctor after doctor on behalf of her young daughter to a person feeling totally insecure about herself.

What really got my goat today was he told my friend's ill daughter she would die during one of her surgeries and she was made to feel that she was a burden on the family.   How can anyone say something like that to a young teenager knowing what she has gone through in her life.

As I said, I don't know all the ins and outs of this story but I know real men... you know the type, who would walk away from a bad relationship with only the clothes on their back and rather starve than seeing their kids go without, do not emotionally and physically abuse their partners and/or kids.


What I cannot understand that how can a grown man do that to his family and still call himself a man... in my mind he is only a creep... 


The good news is that my friend is getting her strength back and his bullying tactics are now failing... she has loads of emotional support around her and no matter what happens during the case she will come out on top.




  

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